she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Edward fifth and chaser hands
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
