Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (919): Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself. http://tfl.nu/ufys
  Replies (46) Good night (674) Bad night (3348)
• Favorite

  (660): View more from Missouri

  i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (660): i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals http://tfl.nu/iisz
  Replies (15) Good night (3558) Bad night (1146)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (904): We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese http://tfl.nu/clhz
  Replies (16) Good night (4201) Bad night (829)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen. http://tfl.nu/c2d0
  Replies (14) Good night (5525) Bad night (935)
• Favorite

  (626): View more from California

  a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (626): a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms http://tfl.nu/zv9q
  Replies (6) Good night (901) Bad night (3839)
• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (607): I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo. http://tfl.nu/qxrp
  Replies (8) Good night (836) Bad night (4073)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick. http://tfl.nu/xsrx
  Replies (21) Good night (1938) Bad night (4991)
• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (205): Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here. http://tfl.nu/viom
  Replies (26) Good night (7721) Bad night (1563)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (419): it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower. http://tfl.nu/ei3p
  Replies (4) Good night (2174) Bad night (932)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected http://tfl.nu/stz5
  Replies (4) Good night (2801) Bad night (1018)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (910): You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year. http://tfl.nu/jiz9
  Replies (12) Good night (3997) Bad night (1038)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (423): By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time. http://tfl.nu/7ckj
  Replies (15) Good night (3252) Bad night (1185)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (740): I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing. http://tfl.nu/h581
  Replies (10) Good night (2405) Bad night (797)
• Favorite

  (972): View more from Texas

  We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (972): We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away". http://tfl.nu/ker4
  Replies (1) Good night (1049) Bad night (512)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue http://tfl.nu/1cyh
  Replies (9) Good night (584) Bad night (1223)

Randomize