If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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