Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Randomize
