office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
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It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
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I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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