plz talk dirty to me
Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
