Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
