I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
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