also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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