whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize