I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
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