next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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