Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
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