wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
