Christians are straight up FREAKS
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
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