I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Randomize
