the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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