Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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