Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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