she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Alive.
So much puke
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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