I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
