Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize