We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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