: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
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