i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
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