Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
So. Much. Porn.
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