i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
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