Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
