Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
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