I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Randomize
