i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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