I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you have to choose: penises or morals?
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Randomize