ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Can I color on your dick again?
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
