Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize