I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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