Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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