i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I still have a little drunk in my system
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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