ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize