Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
