Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
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