Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
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