I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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