Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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