So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
and she was petting her beer can
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
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