she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
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