I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
