Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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