Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
