like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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