I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I lost the right to judge tonight
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
